garfeild on a string

1.5M ratings
277k ratings

See, that’s what the app is perfect for.

Sounds perfect Wahhhh, I don’t wanna
in-mutual-weirdness
penandinkprincess

it obviously makes sense, but one of my friend’s kids is going into swim class, and all the parents got an email today going, “when little ones are scared, they cling on to instructors. PLEASE trim their nails.” 

i don’t know why that’s so funny to me, but just. the idea of this poor, scratched swim instructor having to make sure to email before each class as a reminder to please declaw the children SENT me. 

rockitcat

When I taught swim lessons I remember trying to delicately ask parents not to cover their child in shea/coconut/olive oil before lessons.

“I understand your skincare regimen and wanting to protect their tender baby flesh from the pool chemicals, but COULD YOU NOT OIL YOUR CHILD LIKE A GREASED PIG before tossing them in the POOL? Thanks EVER so much!”

penandinkprincess

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@nakimochiku i CACKLED

tittyblade
macleod

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UPS has reached an agreement with the Teamsters union to equip its iconic brown delivery trucks with air conditioning for the first time for new units.

The agreement, announced by UPS on Tuesday, comes as the delivery giant and the International Brotherhood of Teamsters negotiate the terms of a new contract for more than 330,000 U.S. employees. (source)

Unions work, unionize.

jelloapocalypse

Workers need unions because It's 2023 and I can still see a post like this and involuntarily scream "What do you MEAN they didn't have air conditioning?!" out loud

bird-cannibalism
tuesdayisfordancing

Except I DO think we should be nanny-stating a little more about ballet and football and other worst-for-long-term-health sports! I do! Like it’s worth pointing out the hypocrisy and it’s especially worth pointing out that regular puberty is also irreversible changes but this comparison feels counterproductive to me on the whole. Because I think if we changed how ballet works so kids aren’t going in as deep end as young as they are that would probably be Good, Actually. I’m not 100% certain about this because I do have a pretty strong “autonomy first” instinct and kids have their own ambitions, but the organized sport nature of it makes me like. 95% certain.

toasthaste

THANK YOU yeah augh. I see that post going around and my reaction is mostly "Huh yeah I do think it is bad that kids are uninformedly and permanently fucking up their bodies with football and ballet, I think it would be better if that kind of thing happened less and there wasn't social pressure on kids to pursue things that have those kinds of effects." Which doesn't seem like the response it's angling for at all and makes me think they haven't really thought out their point very well.

prokopetz
prokopetz

"Isn't it weird that [thing humans commonly eat] is poisonous to literally every domesticated animal" I mean, there's a pretty good chance that [thing humans commonly eat] is at least mildly poisonous to humans, too. One of our quirks as a species is that we think our food is bland if it doesn't have enough poison in it.

xeansicemane

Humans have a really weird mix of mundane superpowers.

We're not fast and don't have a lot of natural weaponry but we're bizarrely tolerant to a broad range of toxins to the point that one toxin is considered a morning necessity for some to perform at work. Gotta love us.

vexwerewolf

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chaumas-deactivated20230115
curseworm

i think that every child should have unrestricted access to thick blackberry brambles or some other delicious fruit that grows encased in a painful fortress. i think wading through thorns to reach the cluster of shining ripe berries you spied through a gap between the tangled vines teaches you something important. not sure what though

curseworm

i just know no fruit has ever tasted as sweet as the ones i ate while bleeding under the blistering summer sun

gamercock
snapscube

everyone's saying it but yeah the new tumblr desktop layout is complete garbage lmao

yknow what i really can't fucking stand. how every social media now feels like it's designed for mobile first but then subsequently there is NO design for desktop and they just kinda slap a mobile interface onto a widescreen canvas and fill it with a solid color. like why is what feels like 60% of my dashboard just negative space on a 16:9 monitor. the entire thing is so fucking claustrophobic and just bunched together. use the space!!!! why are the timeline switcher tabs at the top of the screen getting cut off!!! you could fit all of them!!!

snapscube

LIKE WHAT IS GOING ON HERE

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gamercock
1892

is that a cd in your pocket or is your penis just hard and circle. with hole

redsharpieonguitar

is that acassette in your pocket girl or is your pussy just shaped in a recrangle and has a .15 inch tape even though people call it an eighth inch that actually isnt true and its really interesting that the tape is coated in a fine magnetic dust which is how jt works and sugh a small cassette can contain such important music that can change lives just like how humans contain so much more than you can see from the outside . witrh two hole